“A child who is protected from all controversial ideas is as vulnerable as a child who is protected from every germ. The infection, when it comes- and it will come- may overwhelm the system, be it the immune system or the belief system.” Jane Smiley
As a woman with two daughters I know what it means to want to be the best mother I can be and how hard that is to do.
I know the feeling of not being sure whether what we are doing is what is really the best for them – which is all we want to do.
I know the feeling of wanting our kids to be happy and not to hurt too much.
I know the feeling of understanding that in order for our kids to be happy, they must be equipped with the right life tools necessary to make that happen.
I know the feeling of being unsure as to whether we are able to provide our kids with those tools.
I know the feeling of making that motherly decision as to what we think is the best for our kids and going all the way with it.
I know the feeling of disappointment when we realize that we may have been wrong.
I know the feeling of trying something else that is not necessarily accepted by societal standards.
I know the feeling of disapproval from friends and family for trying new methods of mothering.
I know the feeling of contentment when my kids finally get me and understand that all I want for them is to be happy…..but in order to be happy they have to take responsibility for themselves and their actions.
Yes……we have some difficult decisions to make as mothers. The world puts tremendous pressure on us to be “good mothers”. But doesn’t each child require special attention to each of their unique needs – and aren’t we still trying to figure out our own?
As humans, we are unable to truly know what is the best for another person. We can only attempt to explore what is best for ourselves by experiencing life.
With that being said, in my opinion, life experience is the most valuable thing we can pass over to our children….and if that means exposing them to things that may not be so pretty and possibly even controversial…..maybe it’s not such a bad idea to reconsider our definition of what a “good” mother is.
Maybe, instead of making all of our kids decisions for them and taking the chance – with their lives – that our decision may be completely wrong…..we should teach our kids how to effectively make their own decisions and allow them to make their own mistakes and pay their own consequences.
“In order to succeed you must fail, so that you know what not to do the next time.”
– Anthony D’Angelo –
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