I have a funny story that I have to share with anyone who is reading this. Since I have started blogging, part of my journey is visiting other blogs to share my opinions and possibly have a battle of wits – just for the fun of it. That is my definition of “peaceful controversy”…Hence, the name of my blog.
I ran into this particular blog and the blogger seemed to be have some cute stories about her family and whatnot – until I ran into a post revealing the blogger’s opinion about Occupy Wallstreet. The gist of the post was that the blogger felt that based on the media’s representation, Occupy Wallstreet was a bunch of people – the 99% of the population – just complaining about how they wanted what they didn’t have and it wasn’t fair that rest of the 1% of the population had more than them. This blogger then went on to claim that she must be a part of the 1% since she doesn’t butt into other people’s business and worry about what others have. This blogger also stated that she and her husband worked very hard for they had and that if someone wants something in life, hard work will get you it. The message was don’t be jealous of others that have because they worked hard for it.
I commented that the media basically misrepresented the plight of the 99% and mentioned the fact that the middle class is dwindling and these are the very people that pay the most PERCENTAGE of taxes (vs. wages) and should have the right to expect the government to look out for them. I also mentioned that being G-d fearing, (which the blogger said was a very important part of her life) she should not make quick judgments based on what the media says, because even though she may be happy with her lot, there are a lot of very hard working, good people out there that, for some reason or another, struggle and can’t make ends meet. I mentioned that we are not privy to know the reasons why or why not people have and don’t have, but we, as G-d fearing people, must sympathize with others not cast stones.
I said this all in the nicest way possible, but I guess there were a few undertones that the blogger read into. The blogger responded by saying that she was influenced by the media, however…”did always believe that finding my way in this world was my responsibility and it never occurred to me to look to the government to either blame or to help me out. Just thought it was up to me” Then the blogger asked me why I write G-d the way I do (without the O’s).
I didn’t think the blogger understood what I was trying to say based on the reply to my original comment so I replied back…
“I just wanted to clarify that I agree that we are all responsible for our own way in life, however, because we pay taxes to the government the government is responsible for our country in certain ways. My only point was that we must be sympathetic to other good people who work very hard and are still struggling in this country. You and I have found our way, but others are still questioning what “the way is”…being unsympathetic to their journey in life does not help our situation in this country.
My point is a little clearer in my blog post “Democrats vs. Republicans – The Third World War” (in the politics category). I am not necessarily into politics, but I am into equality, free will and peace which, unfortuntely, politics plays a huge role in all three.
I hope you don’t mind my wordy commentary, but I love controversy – as long as it is peaceful! 🙂
P.S. – I leave the O’s out because I am Jewish and when I was little I was taught not to say or write the name of G-d in vain (or we would go to hell) so this is how we did it. You are right, it makes no sense, I simply do it out of habit…”
I did not think that my reply was combative, but I think the blogger did…Here was her reply…
“….. I am certainly sympathetic and am charitable toward those who have had trouble finding their way, so to speak. Unlike you, I avoid controversy whenever possible. I’m one of those who wishes everyone could just get along and be nice and respectful and compassionate all the time…….”
There was some more before and after, but I want to talk about one thing; Avoiding controversy whenever possible – as if controversy is a bad thing. I don’t plan on responding to this blogger anymore, however, I was very confused by this statement. Wasn’t making her opinion public in the first place asking for controversy – especially after claiming that 99% of the American public must be just whiners. Unless – maybe she thought her opinion was fact. I guess then there would be no controversy.
I want to talk about this because this is precisely what I am talking about when I claim that people are not true to themselves – forget about being true to others. No one can avoid controversy. Why? Because we are all different and we have different ways of looking at things. Controversy is a dispute between sides holding opposing views. Controversy is not a bad thing. It is a good thing. It is when controversy becomes a war that it is bad.
So, when this blogger claims that she avoids controversy whenever possible, she is either not aware of the definition of controversy, or, she doesn’t realize that by having a unique opinion she is being controversial – whether she wants to admit it or not. Is she entitled to her opinion – regardless of how others feel about it – of course!!! That is the part we all have got to accept. It doesn’t matter what someone’s opinion is, they are entitled to it. If you want to discuss a different perspective with that person using common sense and logic – why not? Isn’t that how we evolve as humans? By learning new things? Not only that – doesn’t it sharpen our skills to be able to skillfully argue an opinion and encourage seeing new perspectives? What can be wrong with that?
In conclusion, when I do finally get some traffic, comments and opinions – no matter what they are – will be respected, but if I don’t agree, I will present an argument. I hope no one minds or takes offense, as I am entitled to my opinion – and so are you. Let’s try to see eye to eye so that no one has a reason to be offended.
One more idea I want to mention…
It is very important, in my opinion, to validate opinions by logic, common sense and fact, otherwise, you will find that when stating that opinion, you will get mowed down by someone who may find discrepancies that will automatically cause the opinion to become inconsequential because it does not make sense. (i.e. the blogger stating that she tries to avoid controversy whenever possible…)
Sometimes opinions are not valid because the person holding them has not thought the opinion all the way through. The person holding the opinion is simply repeating words that they heard somewhere and regurgitating information that they think applies at the moment. Real opinions that matter are well thought out and can be argued seamlessly by the opinion holder – without taking the debate (or the controversy) personally.
In other words, if two people are arguing about something, the person who really thought about the formulation of their opinion will not be offended by the other person who is trying to invalidate it. They will be able to present clear arguments that will defend their position and if there is a solid answer in response – as opposed to taking it personally, they will actually take the answer into account and reformulate their opinion.
BECAUSE OPINIONS ARE NOT FACTS!!!!!
Our opinions and other opinions are how we interpret personal experiences. By listening to everybody’s opinions, we widen the learning benefits of life experience.
So…please be true to yourself and evaluate your opinions carefully. Don’t just say words that sound good. Listen to others so that you can grow as a person. This is the path to evolving spiritually.
Other posts you might like: